Paint The Target

Summer’s rolling along here in the Northern Hemisphere, and frankly, it’s stinking hot outside. As the sun starts to set, there’s a distinct pleasure in sitting out on the patio furniture and enjoying a nice cold brewski. Or a mint julep, some sangria, a glass of moscato, whatever tickles your palate. The target for June – as chosen by my lovely girlfriend when she was quite inebriated and in the middle of a Pitch Perfect marathon – was the word Drunk. Drunk on beverages, drunk with power, models painted while the artists themselves were enjoying  a tipple – the standard Target rules apply, wherein if you can come up with some spurious reasoning, the entry is good to go. Let’s see what we got!

Pete F has made me proud, knocking out a Hooch Hauler! I can speak from personal experience, this is a heck of a model to muscle through once it hits the painting table. Well done, that man!

When you dig deep into the history of Warhammer, Josef Bugman is a name synonymous with dwarven ales. Pepperidge Farms, along with Prophaniti1978, remembers.

Wallorspin spent some time analyzing the archons, and after much vigorous rimunations determined that the Thamarite Archon was the most likely to get drunk. The Dhunian Archon was the most likely to have booze on her person at any time, but she also has the strongest tolerance, so the best she can do is get a warm buzz on.

Dieson’s Sorscha may be too young to drink, but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t tapped into her superior’s Uiske. Also, this model represents Khador’s signature warcaster when she was a mere kovnik apprentice, so when she was drunk on love for a certain horselord prince of Umbrey…

DrQ has presented a chibi chaos kill team. CHIBI FOR THE CHIBI GOD! BUBBLEGUM FOR THE BUBBLEGUM THRONE! Short, adorable, debauched. DrQ may have been drunk h imself when he came up with this idea…

I’m not even going to begin cataloging Fiendil’s entry. Apparently there was a bottle of tequila, some vodka, some cider, three spaced out nights with the intent of painting as much as possible. Behold, yon results.

I’d like to welcome KrrNiGit and his first entry into Paint The Target. Despite this month’s more restrictive theme, he’s managed to knock out a portable bar. I mean, I’m pretty sure that’s an alcoholic concoction he’s pouring into that skin. I’m curious how hard it is for him to turn off the spigot without losing hot coals!

Lonelymonk tripped out the Scharde Isles and brought back some Satyxis Raiders, the  hardest partiers in Cryx. When Ravenmane lets them disembark from their pirate fleet you know the bars are going to get rowdy.

Ain’t no party like a Gremlin beach party, complete with keg stand. Lostie Ben pulled out one of the recent minicrate models and then – as punishment for his hubris – had to paint a bikini on a gremlin.

Thor is, of course, a regular drinker of Asgardian ale and mead. According to the MCU he’s also fond of local, Earth-based brews. According to this model by Miggy Sawdust, he’s also three bottles in before even starting the fight.

After a long hiatus that I can only ascribe to far too many jammy dodgers and a large pot of earl grey, NotThatOne returns with some bayoux gremlins. Chug! Chug! Chug!

JUNE WINNER

The worm in the bottom of the bottle is whispering to me. Something about investing in pork bellies. Oh, and this month’s winner is NotThatOne! Toss me your address and we’ll get something winging its way to you via intercontinental ballistic gerbil. Or via the postal service. Whatever’s more convenient.

JULY CHALLENGE!

It’s a hot Summer and as much as I want to go out and play with my SCA pals, there’s something to be said for staying home and tending the garden. This month’s theme, therefore, is twofold. Swords to Plougshares. Models with swords – Hyborian bastard swords, Caspian battle blades, chainswords – or models in tune with nature. Thinking about it, the Farmers Guild from Guild Ball would be ideal, or maybe some Halflings. Primal Archon? Usual rules apply. If you can think of justification, you send hit the target. The point is, as always, to get you painting.

Send in your pics of newly painted shinies to submissions@losthemisphere.com by Noon EST, July 28th. Deadline is deadline, people. Once more, one random participant will receive a little somethin’ somethin’ in the mail. You want somethin’? You gotta submit! Don’t forget to include your online handle! Oh, and if you can make the pics attachments to the emails rather than inline, that’d help me on the formatting end.