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Tabletop wargaming and other nerdery

Tabletop wargaming and other nerdery

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  • RQ: Helga On Wheels

    Posted on March 27, 2020 7:00 am by gdaybloke Comment

    Every once in awhile a model comes along that you just have to paint. Does it belong to a game you play? Is it usable in your preferred faction? I need you to understand, these are lesser questions. Of more significant import is, when you view the model, do the creative synapses in your cerebellum fire and scream across your consciousness that you need to apply paint to this thing, practicality and functionality be damned? In case you haven’t figured it out yet, that’s how I felt when I got my hands on Helga On Wheels.

    A Scout and a Warlock for the Thornfall Alliance, as with any Riot Quest model she can be used in both Riot Quest and Hordes, screaming across the table on her spike-wheeled hawg and swinging her spiked bat like an unholy cross between Mad Max, Harley Quinn, and Porco Rosso.

    Did we mention she’s wearing what appears to be denim jeans? Helga On Wheels may be a Riot Quest model, but she’s also a post-apocalyptic Iron Kingdoms fashion pioneer, a long way from her valkyrior days.  Continue reading → Post ID 19521

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    Minions Riot Quest
  • Sides of a Coin: The Void and Primal Archons

    Posted on November 8, 2019 7:00 am by gdaybloke Comment

    The essence of creation, the primordial urge that pushes the axlotl out of murky soup with an urge to go bipedal and take up chartered accountancy, wars with the inevitable advance of entropy. Where there is life, their is death. With the other-dimensional Infernals breaking through the walls of reality, both aspects are manifesting alongside the deific Archons of Menoth, Morrow and Thamar, to fight not just for the souls of humanity, but for reality itself.

    Alright, that’s just my persona take on the Void and Primal Archons, but hey, I like it.

    Continue reading → Post ID 19521

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    Mercenaries Minions
  • Croak’d: Underchief Mire

    Posted on June 19, 2019 7:00 am by gdaybloke Comment

    While the gatormen of the Blindwater Congregation hold sway in most of the wetlands and marshes of the Iron Kingdoms, especially with their demigod Barnabas channeling the power of the Devourer Wurm, one should never underestimate the other, “lesser” races of the swamps. Swamp Gobbers, Bog Trogs and Croaks often fill support roles in the armies of their larger scalier brethren, but deem them less of a threat at your peril. Underchief Mire is a Croak Shaman of no small repute, and today we’re taking a look at his sweet model.

    A two part model, Underchief Mire needs little cleanup – remove a couple of resin nubs, scrape away a little flash, and your done. As with most Croaks, Mire has an enormous, bulbous chin and a bare belly to match. Suckers on his finger- and toe-tips mean he can occasionally pretend to be Spider-Man. Teeth and skulls are scattered around the model, but so are feathers, making Underchief Mire both creepy -and- fabulous.

    Painting Underchief Mire was a lot of fun. I haven’t had a lot of practice with feathers – they’re not really a feature on most Menite models – but if I ever hope to paint a Storm Raptor one day, Mire’s headdress was a good start. Painting the hands and feet was also an interesting experiment in layering and glazing. I’m really pleased with how he turned out, and he looks pretty neat on his Dragon Forge resin base, which adds a little weight to an otherwise very light resin model.

    In terms of play, Underchief Mire is a Lesser Warlock. This means he packs his own Fury stat, can cast a couple of spells, but more interestingly, he opens up the Warbeast stable a little. He’ll play for all four of the core Hordes factions – Trollbloods, Skorne, Circle and Legion – and he’ll bring with him any of the Gatorman Warbeasts, but he can also bring Swamp Trolls. This can add a Drag element to any faction he’s played with (yes, I know how that sounds).

    He also ups the Fury efficiency with Attuned Spirit, allowing him to cast one of his warbeast’s animi for free once per turn. Stack that with Caustic Mist and Weald Secrets on his own spell list, and you’ve got a decently versatile 4 pt addition to your army. Note that he can also cast Caustic Mist and step into the AoE himself without harm, being immune to Corrosion, and let his Prowl ability turn that cover into Stealth as he moves up the table.

    Underchief Mire is ready to stab your opponents with his poisoned spear, or maybe just add Swamp Trolls to your Legion of Everblight list. Either way, check with your FLGS or preferred online retailer. Ribbit.

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    Minions
  • Bride of Arkadius

    Posted on February 22, 2019 7:00 am by gdaybloke Comment

    When I think of the Minions subfactions for Hordes – the Thornfall Alliance and the Blindwater Congregation – I freely acknowledge the coolness of the gators (heck, I own a Dracodile) but when it comes to things that just look like they’d be immense fun to play with, the porcine protagonists of the Thornfall Alliance win the day. I mean, a bunch of their warbeasts actively have a rule referencing the tastiness of bacon. The Meat Thresher is a weaponized, pig-powered steamroller. Helga and her Valkyries bring forth images of the Ring of Nibelung (and shadows of Bugs Bunny’s duel with Elmer Fudd, complete with spear and magic helmet). And then there’s the maddest damn scientist the Iron Kingdoms have ever seen – Arkadius.

    While Nemo is off harnessing electricity, while the necrotechs of the Scharde Isles are suturing zombie bits to mechanika, Arkadius is off somewhere hidden in the woods engaging in bioengineering, genetic experimentation, and dangit, if some of his test subject don’t actually survive. With the announcement of May’s MiniCrate model  (the Seeker of Silence) we also found out what the new bonus model for six month VIP subscribers is: The Bride of Arkadius.

    On the one hand, it’s a gender-switched Arkadius. On the other hand, it’s a great looking mad scientist, and at the same time the hair is perfect tor the Bride Of Frankenstein black hair with the white streaks up the side. This model is a table-legal variant on Dr Arkadius, encouraging the young women of the Iron Kingdoms to go into medical fields and look badass in longcoats. I’m pretty sure not every one of them is going to go down the path of evil mad science, and even from those that do I think that the number that find themselves leaning toward genetic experimentation with squealing hogs should be minimal.

    And then I’m reminded of the time I watched a game be won by Dr Arkadius, by assassination, as the good doctor poked their opponent to death with the needle gun. I’ll remind everyone that the combat syringe is P+S4 and does one damage per attack. I’m all distracted now and chuckling. That’s like beating someone up with a ripe banana.

    Want to add the Bride of Arkadius to your collection? You can subscribe to MiniCrate at https://www.mini-crate.com/

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    Minions Reviews
  • Husky

    Posted on July 18, 2018 7:00 am by gdaybloke Comment

    I painted a thing! When your friend does you a favor, you repay in kind as you’re able. Lonelymonk did me a solid, in exchange I pulled out the brushes and painted up a Gatorman Husk to march with his Blindwater models as they spread the good word of Barnabas to the heathen fleshy pink-skins. Those tasty, tasty humans…

    The Gatorman Husk is one of my favourites of the most recent wave of Blindwater models, the other being the boil master. The idea of a zombie gator sloughing his way across the field, just waiting to burst and cover the foe with a swath of biting and stinging things creates such an evocative image in my mind…

    I decided I wanted to keep the colour scheme fairly muted, with some colour on the bugs to provide pop. Light browns, some yellows, a mix of washes provided main tones or the skin and scales. The main ridge down the back almost looks like it’s made of wood, but that just means I might have found a recipe for planking on a future model.All in all I’m pretty happy with this fellow. The base is left undone so that Lonelymonk can do it to match his existing army. Even if his other gators are green and this is the only brown one, matching bases will provide a degree of cohesion to keep everything working together.

    As a little plug, almost the entire model was painted with one Games & Gears Master Hybrid brush and one of their Pro Studio brushes. I get a lot of mileage out of their double-ended brushes. I have a bunch of their brushes with reversible caps, which I mainly use when I travel to paint because I get peace of mind knowing the bristles are secure, but the double ended Master Hybrid brushes are my workhorses right now.

    Next on the painting table are some models coming to GenCon to play against Ninja Steve. I could try to do a last minute entry for the Golden Kobold chibi painting competition, but I don’t know that I have enough time to dedicate to making a worthy entry, no matter how much Drew makes puppy dog eyes at me…

    I’m just happy to have finished a model 😉

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    Minions Painting
  • Gatorman Boil Master & Spirit Cauldron

    Posted on February 23, 2018 7:00 am by gdaybloke Comment

    I’m torn with regard to today’s model. Don’t misunderstand me, I think it looks great, but I’m torn between thinking the Boil Master is caught up in his summoning ritual, yelling in exhilaration that  it actually worked, or he’s welcoming an old friend for a hug.  That last one will make more sense in a minute. One way or another the Boil Master and Spirit Cauldron continues the pattern of super sweet models joining the Blindwater Congregation this month.

    Continue reading → Post ID 19521

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    Minions Reviews
  • Longchops

    Posted on February 21, 2018 7:00 am by gdaybloke 1 Comment

    Continuing on our reptilian adventures, today we get Longchops, who is in no waya Crodocile Dundee analogue. He’s a gator, not a croc. There’s a difference. Now, Alligator McDougal from Florida, maybe… Longchops was introduced to the Iron Kingdoms through the Unleashed RPG, where he was one of the starter characters in the adventure kit. Someone thought “Hey, let’s take the most physically imposing race in the team, the guy with the nastiest natural weaponry and most tanky resilience, and make  him the ranged attack specialist!”. I was amused.

    Longchops comes in four components, but don’t be misled – assembly isn’t 100% foolproof.

    Continue reading → Post ID 19521

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    Minions Reviews
  • Blindwater Congregation Army Box

    Posted on February 12, 2018 7:00 am by gdaybloke 1 Comment

    Lizards and fish! Fish and lizards! I’m surrounded by scales and bumpy reptilian skin! The Dracodile stares at me, jaws agape. Barnabus, Lord of Blood, stares at me, jaws agape. A significant portion of the Blindwater Congregation Army Box stars at me, jaws agape. Has Privateer released a canon recipe for painting reptile tongues? There may be some in my future…

    Continue reading → Post ID 19521

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    Minions Reviews
  • Barnabus, Lord of Blood

    Posted on February 9, 2018 7:00 am by gdaybloke 1 Comment

    There was a time when I didn’t own any Blindwater models. Then there was a Dracodile in my house. It wasn’t long after that, that I found myself looking at this fellow and pondering if the universe wasn’t pointing me at reptilian necromancy with zombie fish people and ritual sacrifice and the endless debate of alligator versus crocodile. Oh, and let’s have one of them be a demigod. That doesn’t fly in the face of my inherent Menite tendencies at all…

    does it?

    Continue reading → Post ID 19521

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    Minions
  • MiniCrate: October – The Swamp Siren

    Posted on November 3, 2017 7:00 am by gdaybloke 1 Comment

    Happy Friday, Losties! A quick one today, as we slide into the weekend. All around the world, happy little WarmaHordesers are hearing a clunk in their mailboxes as Privateer Press’ own subscription box venture, Mini-Crate! It’s very exciting, knowing that every month I can expect an exclusive mystery miniature, a reimagining of Warmachine and Hordes models, something new and interesting to paint, perhaps whimsical, perhaps twisted. Okay, the sheep onesie’s a bit much, but I gotta say I really like the Swamp Horror, and I’m jonesing for the Feralgeist of Christmas Past…

    (if you click the box it’ll totes take you to the Mini-Crate website. No foolin’!)

    Continue reading → Post ID 19521

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    Mercenaries Minions

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