Clockwork Dragon’s Cans Pt 2 – The Results

PG Pure Mongrel is back to fill us in on the results of the Foodmachine event held recently at the Clockwork Dragon in Geelong. He wrote many words. You might enjoy them.

dragonG’day again from the land filled with so many dangerous animals, the sea felt compelled to girt it.

In my last post I outlined the methods used to generate donations for our Foodmachine event. This post is how the event went down.


Before I get to that though I need to give a few shout outs:

  • Chris, Jason, Trent, James, Shoshie, Meg, Aidan, Jay, Trevor, Tim, Will and the lads at GUF; thank you again for your support. Without you guys there is no possible way we could have smashed out as many cans as we did.
  • Gerrard, terrain builder extraordinaire. Some how this man worked more hours per day than 24, helped take care of twin babies and some how managed to bend time to his will long enough to build some very unique terrain for our event. (See below). I would be remiss to not mention his wife Holly for her support (e.g. not killing me and him) for eating up all his spare time.


  • David for being the judge on the day. His ability to check off army lists is super human and his ability to recall and apply the rules is inhuman. Without him, wrong calls could well have been the order of the day.
  • Gary, Dale, Leanne and my War-Gamer Widow wife Deb. Pro tip; If you are going to run a 40 player event, try not to do it with a bacterial lung infection and delirious with fever. These four some how made sense of my delusional ramblings, and interpretive dance, all while keeping the admin side of the event running like clockwork (pun intended).
  • Leigh, Nathan and Jon from the Geelong Gamers Guild for the venue and canteen support.

Each and every one of you is a champion. I cannot thank you enough.

Now to the event…

The Clockwork Dragon is an 8 team, 40 player, 35 point, second list optional, SR2015 event (with our twist). It started as a way to bring four remote metas together and share the joy of Warmahordes … now, in it’s own way, it has become a family event.

Though based in Geelong it includes players from, Altona (65km away), Ballarat (100km away), Ararat / Bendigo (200km away) and as far away as Canberra (725km away). Needless to say, players travel that far for a single day event because of the freaking awesome community atmosphere.




Best overall:                                                 Shane Osborne

Best Team:                                                   Blow the Man Down and Sucker Him!



Best overall Army:                                       Adam Smith

Best Unit:                                                      Jamie Sherlock

Best Jack:                                                      David Wolfe

Best Beast:                                                    Paul Hadskis-Gordon

Best Warlock:                                               Sarah Crowe

Best Warcaster:                                           Gerrard Unmack

Best Solo:                                                      David Warner



The Calamity Gang:                                     Aidan Kofoed

Point Blank Money Shot:                           Jeff Milne

Impending Snacking:                                 David Bresaz

Warpath to Bacon:                                      Aaron Cooper

Draconic Snacking:                                     Melanie Renison

Serpentine Force Hammer:                      Reece Surkitt

Binge Drinking Tag Team:                         Paul Hadskis-Gordon

Blow the Man Down and Sucker Him:     David Warner



Cygnar:                                                          David Warner

Menoth:                                                          Campbell Rowe

Cryx:                                                               Jason Parkes

Khador:                                                          Peter Moller

Retribution:                                                   Jake Mills

Mercenaries:                                                 Scott McGregor

Trollbloods:                                                  Jamie Sherlock

Circle:                                                            Aaron Cooper

Legion:                                                          Jeff Milne

Skorne:                                                          Paul Hadskis-Gordon

Minions:                                                        Melanie Renison



8th Place

Blow the Man Down and Sucker Him! (Canberra)

  • Sarah Crowe (Captain)
  • Nathan Smith
  • David Warner
  • Ian Hill
  • Jack Crowe

7th Place

Serpentine Force Hammer (Ballarat / Geelong)

  • Reece Surkit (Captain)
  • Cameron Jervies
  • Josh Jervies
  • Dave Atkins
  • Jackson Carr

6th Place

Draconic Snacking (Geelong)

  • Daniel Bartels (Captain)
  • Melanie Rension
  • Gerrard Unmack
  • James Munro
  • David Wolfe

12042845_901987446503853_8802735161429127260_n5th Place

Binge Drinking Tag Team (Geelong)

  • Paul Hadskis-Gordon (Captain)
  • Adam Smith
  • Mathew McGrath
  • Scott McGregor
  • Shane Osborn


4th Place

Warpath to Bacon (Canberra / Altona / Geelong)

  • Peter Moller (Captain)
  • Aaron Cooper
  • Lucas Conte
  • Max Dextersmith
  • Michael Peska

3rd Place

Impending Snacking (Ballarat)

  • Daniel Blackburn (Captain)
  • Narelle Fleming
  • Jamie Sherlock
  • David Bresaz
  • Grant Luke

2nd Place

 Point Blank Money Shot (WSWA)

  • Stephen Danczak (Captain)
  • Yugi Zhang
  • Chris Doherty
  • Jake Mills
  • Jeff Milne

1st Place

 The Calamity Gang (Ballarat)

  • Aidan Kofoed (Captain)
  • Campbell Rowe
  • Marc Hazelwood-Smith
  • Jason Parkes
  • Alex Rowe


Next, and final, article I will run through the lessons learned and what we will change for the Clockwork Dragon 2016.