Turner and Hooch (Hauler)

Sometimes an old cop buddy movie with a dog is just what you need. Other times, it’s an enormous barrel on wheels, full of booze that’ll rot a human stomach out in a matter of minutes, being pulled by polar bears. Oh, and what the heck, let’s weaponize the damn thing too. Lostie TheGreatGaspy has been indulging his inner Northkin lately, and when the Hooch Hauler was announced, well, let’s just say he had to start wearing a bib to catch all of the drool. We just told everyone he lived at Red Lobster now, so he wouldn’t be shunned.

So many Hoochy bits! If you convert the driver to being female, is she a Hoochy momma? That enormous resin barrel needs to be hollowed out and fitted with a tiny working spigot. Just sayin’. Drink responsibly, obey your state’s drinking laws. Don’t drink and commandeer polar-bear-pulled wagons.

While the support frame for the barrel is thin, those wheels are wideset for better traction on snowy paths and for rolling over inattentive rhulfolk.

At the rear, the worky-worky parts to get appropriate levels of grog up to the guys riding on the back.


You know your brew has been fermenting too long when it’s producing it’s own whelps…

And you know, just when you’re all set to light the fuse, Dave’s sitting at the back having a smoke break instead of climbing to be the counterweight that launches the barrel… Dammit, Dave…


The Hearthgut Hooch Hauler is a Black Anchor Industries release, meaning you can only order it directly from Privateer Press. Here, have a link. https://store.privateerpress.com/hooch-hauler